Mixed state ( Deadly thoughts to mania and back) the fun times.

I talk to live, but i dont live to talk.

I have been open about the pain in my head, and the desire to want to die.

Most people do not even realizes how serious i am about my situation. I am actually lucky my family doesn’t check up on me, and the seemed bothered by me. Makes hiding easier.

My psychiatrist said i am in crisis, i have met with my therapist once, but we talked again, with another appointment a week from the first.

The professionals know theres a problem, everyone else besides the few, dont know because they won’t check. Good.

No one noticed that i am no longer a mental health advocate, due to a problem of broken trust. Another story that will never be told.

Truth is i am glad no one thinks i am still sick. Except my wife and her family. I am alone, though my wife is here, but i just seem to feel alone.

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