The day i needed input, got none.

I know i am not the best writer on here. I tell my story as it comes. Yesterday was hell, but it was needed.

I dont get why people spend a lifetime with you, and just dont care to know you. I am an open book. I make major mistakes due to my illnesses and i try my hardest to clean them up.

This has been going on for 40+ years. I have referred to myself, that i was the planned mistake. They wanted a boy who was normal, they got a boy who was not. The truth is i think death would cleanse this world of a bumsickle, the has fought and fought to be normal.

That truth isn’t the real truth though, its a truth based on how life has flipped me all over. I was just about out of a mixed state, when a person who i didnt know was getting warnings, decided to set me off again.

The truth is i still dont know what the hell the person was talking about.

People- if your going to attack a person in a mixed cycle, at least bring proof, cause frankly it was in my illnesses and i have no clue. I apologize for feelings, but not stupid enough to apologize for an action i cant control. An apology means i will never do bbn it again.

I am Bipolar- i will screw up again, and if i keep expressing my feelings i will live through these tough times.

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